This week's top 9 Montreal shows includes two festivals, shoegaze, country and a punk rager

I guess I’ve been living under a rock because last week I didn’t tell you street urchins about the M for Montreal festival, which started on Wednesday and wraps things up over the weekend. Sorry fuckos! To be brutally frank, I always thought that government sanctioned fest should’ve been called M for Meh, but fuggit — if they can grab some of that govt dosh instead of putting up dry wall like the rest of us, godspeed! Even as much of a curmudgeon as I am, I’ll admit that there are always some exceptional gigs in their program, and this weekend is no exception. Also, it was M for Montreal of yesteryear that gave me the shining moment of watching Kiss’s Gene Simmons (my childhood hero — and I still love the fug outta Kiss) — who nobody recognized, natch — watching local noiseniks AIDS Wolf with a pained and contorted look on his mug. Majik!

Friday: So after my shit-talking, I will have to give M for Montreal the ol’ Hammer reach-around as they did have the forethought to get the young promotion team hopped up on modern psych, Mothland, involved. Celebrating five years of bringing you gigs that rearrange yer frontal lobes, Mothland have curated a corker tonight at la Sala Rossa. Hang out with a bunch of festival talent buyers from Europe as they ask where to get bagels and catch Crasher, Absolutely Free, Grim Streaker, Gloin and the punky prowess of Priors getting things started right. Note the late door time! 4848 St-Laurent, 10 p.m., $15

Geez, maybe I was unfairly giving M4M a shit toupee ’cause they’re pretty much owning Friday night. Egg on my face! Another great M4M gig has Uubbuurruu main man and supreme duder Joe Napoleon taking some time out from his psych-driven combo and emerges with a far friendlier country and psych folk strum. This sexy stud muffin will unleash his new rekkid Mirages at (gulp) the ever sexy wonderland of Café Cleopatra. Hotcha! Just like the gig at Sala, this has an old-school start time, too. 1230 St-Laurent, 10:30 p.m., $10

Phew, once again the Barfly regs pick up stakes and move it up to Little Italy when the always unpredictable (they cover Van Halen AND Rough Trade) Tanker 20 play at the always weird Hémisphère Gauche. Opening are those power popsters Punching Weasel and new kids on the block the Ouatte Key Band. Could Hémisphère Gauche become the new hip spot in town? 221 Beaubien E., 8 p.m., ?$ (probs $10, maybe $15, def not $20)

Damn, Friday is stacked to the rafters. If you went to see the mighty, mighty Bakersfield twang of the Firemen at le Ritz last night, you will definitely want to keep it ringing when total crooner Li’l Andy loads his 10 gallon lid into Casa with a full band in tow! This much pedal steel two nights in a row? Yasss!!! 4871 St-Laurent, 8 p.m., $17.85

Riff hounds, I got ya. For maximum riffage, you will want to march your oversized and bleached white trainers to le Ritz to catch D.C.’s pulverizing Genocide Pact. Making yer metal banging Friday night king-sized is Vomit Forth (oh my sides!!), Sedimentum and Scorching Tomb. FYI: air guitar has now been officially replaced by air keyboards so grab that imaginary Yamaha DX7 and let those fingers fly! Helloooooo ladies! 179 Jean-Talon W., 7 p.m., $26.25

Saturday: I have always said that Grim Skunker and Groovy Aardvarker Vince Peake may have the misfortune of being enlisted in the worst-named bands —I don’t know, maybe ever — but he’s still my number one pic for the nicest guy who has ever graced a Montreal stage. A close second, though, would be literally everyone in Vulgaires Machins, even the three I haven’t met yet. If you’re into that punker shit that has all the kids doing the electric boogaloo and the wang dang doodle, the Vulgaires Machins gig should really get you doing the worm in the pit of MTelus. If that wasn’t enough to get you to dust off the Chucks, the direct support is Anti-Flag!!! Hotcha! and getting the night going will be the poppier side of locals Sainte Catherines, Mudie, with Charogner. Okay, let’s review: M4M is shit, Vincent Peake is a god who walks among us, hmmm….these Pizza Pockets are making me moody. 59 Ste-Catherine E., doors 6 p.m., show 7 p.m., $59–$119

If a fest sponsored by SOCAN makes you break out in hives and you want to catch some REAL indie spirit, head to the second night of Cuch Fest, now in its 15th edition. A literal ton of bands for very little scratch. Check it: Bigbigdogdog, Ce Qui Nous Traverse, Consolamentum, Geraldine Eguiluz, Guiom and Anette, Grosse Roche and a shitload more. All happening in the very indie-friendly confines of Casa at a price you can probably scoop outta yer couch. 4871 St-Laurent, 7:30 p.m., $15

Tuesday: Shoegazy popsters Preoccupations will be packing the WFMU/KXLU listeners into le Ritz for what is sure to be a sweaty mid-week gig but the reason you will not want to be tardy is to catch a local name I have not tapped out in a long, long time: No Joy. Expect to see some old faces mixed in with the young bucks for this one. In the sweat slot is Etamine. 179 Jean-Talon W., 7 p.m., $16.93

Finally if you were at the Vomit Forth gig (love typing that killer name out), you will want to get rid of your bangover with a bit of the hair of the dawg while Incite bring the riffs and breakdowns to Turbo Haüs with Dissymmetry (didn’t like tapping that out, though) and False Gods. Remember the Turb unholy trinity of roolz: No Gods, No Masters, No Moshing! 2040 St-Denis, 7 p.m., $16.93

Current Obsession: Honey Ltd, The Complete LHI Recordings

For more Montreal music coverage, please visit the Music section.